bonne nuit

Bonne nuit ma grand-mère. Votre fils vous embrassé bonne nuit et vous faire savoir qu'il partait pour l'Amérique de demain. At-il vous faire savoir qu'il était temps d'aller, le temps pour vous de faire ce que vous devez faire? Je l'espère.

So this evening, UK time, my father said good bye to my grandmother for the last time. Let me rephrase that ... said good bye to his mother. I cannot fathom that right now. To me that is so overwhelming of a thought. I need to focus on my grandmother and not my mother.

She has a catheter and appears to be almost in a coma. Did anyone bother to tell her that it is just fine for her to evolve into what comes next in this universe? I really hope so. From my mother, this evening, I heard the story of her friend making it to the hospital in South America where his father was. He picked up his father's hand to let him know that his son was home. In that instant his father pulled in his last breath. He waited.

Some people are like that .. they wait. Some are asked to wait on life support until family members get there. Some cannot hold on any longer and have to let go.

Grandma held on. Grandma needed to see my father. I hope she is not waiting for the rest of us to show up. Some it has been twenty years since they have been back, others were there, the youngest niece has never met her and I doubt the baby boy remembers her. They have upped the morphine and that means she is in pain. That I do not like. That pains me.

Fly sweet lady. My great grandmother asked for a ride in the car. A ride through the countryside, at least that is how it has been told to me. I knew her. I knew my great grandmother and that is a luxury not many have. She took that ride to see the flowers, the greenery of the natural world, the peaceful English countryside with larks singing in the sky, smiled and closed her eyes.

Fly with the larks or flash from the trees over the streams like the brilliant kingfishers. Oh I have not thought of either of those birds in so long. I loved watching both of those specific birds in the countryside .. and then those most majestic and magnificent owls. Take flight beautiful lady.

Godspeed.

Tomorrow morning (two hours from now it will be 6 am) and my father will climb into a car with his brother or sister and begin that trip back to London. Climb aboard a plane and head for home. Will his mother have taken flight by then, will my grandmother have slipped these mortal coils. Part of me hopes so. This way maybe his pain will be less in heading home, leaving the place of his birth, the place of all of our births.

Godspeed my father. Travel in peace. Love you. Love mum. Love my brothers, my sister in law and all my family. Love to my wonderful friends.

S'envoler bel oiseau, envole-toi belle dame.